Alright, let’s talk about this North Node in the 8th house journey. When I first stumbled upon this placement in my own chart, I didn’t really get it. Sounded intense, maybe a bit dark, dealing with stuff like other people’s money, intimacy, death, transformation. My comfort zone? Definitely the opposite – the 2nd house South Node stuff: my own stuff, my own money, keeping things stable and predictable, maybe a little too focused on material comfort.
For years, honestly, I lived that South Node life pretty hard. I was all about building my own security. My savings, my possessions, my sense of self-worth tied tightly to what I owned or earned. Sharing resources felt… risky. Like I’d lose control or not have enough. And deep emotional intimacy? Vulnerability? Nah, I wasn’t great at that. Kept things pretty surface-level, avoided digging into the messy, complicated parts of relationships or even my own psyche. It felt safer that way, sticking to what I knew, what I could touch and count.
Making the Shift (or Trying To)
The shift started slowly. It wasn’t like a light switch flipped. It was more like life kept nudging me, sometimes shoving me, towards 8th house themes whether I liked it or not. Maybe it was dealing with unexpected debt, or navigating a partner’s financial situation, or facing some deep-seated fears I couldn’t ignore anymore.
So, I started consciously trying to lean into it. Here’s what that looked like in practice, day-to-day:
- Facing Financial Fears: Instead of hoarding my money, I started practicing letting go a bit. This meant actually looking at joint finances without panic, talking openly about money with my partner, even investing in things that felt less tangible or secure but required trust. Had to really work on the scarcity mindset.
- Practicing Vulnerability: This was tough. I literally had to practice sharing things I was scared or ashamed of. Started small, maybe with a trusted friend or partner. Saying things like “I’m actually really scared about this” or “I need help.” It felt awkward as hell at first, still does sometimes.
- Exploring the Deep Stuff: I started reading more about psychology, symbolism, things that weren’t just practical and material. Spent more time reflecting on my own patterns, motivations, the hidden stuff. Didn’t necessarily go full-on therapy, but lots of journaling and honest self-talk.
- Dealing with Control: Realized how much I tried to control outcomes, especially financially and emotionally. The practice here was consciously letting go, trusting the process, trusting others (carefully, of course), and accepting that I couldn’t manage everything. This involved dealing with shared responsibilities where I didn’t have the final say.
What I Noticed Happening
It hasn’t been a smooth ride. There were definitely times I slipped back into old habits, clinging to security, shutting down emotionally. It’s uncomfortable territory.
But, slowly, things started changing. Weirdly, the less I obsessed over my security, the more supported I actually felt. Like trusting the universe, or partnerships, or whatever, actually opened doors. Relying only on myself was exhausting; learning to merge resources or energy felt… empowering, eventually. Less lonely, too.
Relationships got deeper. Messier, yes, because real intimacy involves facing the shadows, but also much more meaningful. When you stop hiding the “ugly” bits, you can connect on a totally different level. It builds real trust, not just surface-level politeness.
I also found I became more resilient. Facing uncomfortable truths, whether about finances, relationships, or mortality, kind of toughens you up. You realize you can handle more than you thought. The transformation part isn’t just theoretical; you feel yourself changing, shedding old skins.
It’s still a work in progress, always. The 8th house isn’t a place you just arrive at and unpack. It’s a process of continually choosing depth over surface, trust over fear, transformation over stagnation. Some days are easier than others. But looking back, leaning into this uncomfortable path has brought way more richness and meaning to my life than just sticking to my old comfort zone ever did. It’s about learning to swim in deeper waters, and finding strength you didn’t know you had.
